things accomplished amoung us

If I could have a do-over…

Holly — Tue, 10 May 2011 00:38:18 +0000

Servant Leader: Has something to say
LeaderMan: Wants a platform on which to say something

LeaderMan: Wants you to know he’s a Leader
Servant Leader: You’re not sure he knows he’s a leader

LeaderMan: Loves the idea of the Gospel, and the idea of The Church
Servant Leader: Loves God and the actual individual people God brings across his path

LeaderMan: Helps you find where God is leading you in his organization
Servant Leader: Helps you find where God is leading you

LeaderMan: Gets together with you to talk about his vision
Servant Leader: Just gets together with you

LeaderMan: Wants the right people on the bus
Servant Leader: Wants to find the right bus for you, and sit next to you on it

LeaderMan: Invests time in you, if you are “key people”
Servant Leader: Wastes time with you

LeaderMan: Gives you things to do
Servant Leader: Gives you freedom

Copied from the house church I subscribe to. I came from and led in the style of leaderman. That was what was modelled for me, that was the model I adopted. I understand now how immature and unhealthy it was for Body of Christ living and serving. I wished I would have led like Servant Leader. Actually, that Leader word should just go away… unless it is referring to Jesus.

The Danger of “Application”

Holly — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:35:12 +0000

Maybe this is not a danger for anyone else so I don’t want to accuse others of my sin. But it seems that a large part of my spiritual growth strategies fall under the category of “application.” Having been on a church staff in some teaching capacities, I usually felt compelled or was compelled (usually by those attending Bible studies) to show how whatever God stuff we were talking about “applied to my life.” How does this Scripture apply to my life? How can we apply the lessons of today’s sermon to our daily lives? How can I take what I am learning from this book and apply it to my life? Personal application seemed logical, practical (heaven forbid learning God stuff fail to be practical!), and quite frankly, the whole point – right?!

Consider for a moment the demand for application in other areas of life aside from the spiritual (forgive me, Rob Bell, for truly everything is spiritual!). If I have a need to address some skin disorder I buy a product, read the application instructions on the back or the box and follow those application guidelines to achieve the desired results. I’m currently trying to kill some nail fungus on my right foot. I googled my problem (nail fungus), found thousands of treatment options, picked one, got the products and have been applying them daily. Problem plus product correctly applied should give ME the benefit I desire. The whole thing is about securing something for me. Works fine in the realm of itchy skin and foot fungus. But it is a dangerous strategy to apply to God.

Why do I go to God? In the past the truth is I went to get something for myself. I would not have said that. I certainly did not consciously think it. I would have been offended at the suggestion. But that is really what was going on and that made me the point. My life was a problem, God was the recommended product, and I sat in class after class and listened to sermon after sermon on how to apply it all to my life. God said to me yesterday that it was time to stop using The Divine as a ticket to something else. Being in God’s presence for the pure sake of being in God’s presence it the point.

Learning new prayer and meditation practices for the sake of being able to teach them to others makes seeking God a means to the end of teaching; a noble and good reason to learn them BUT the point of prayer and meditation is God – NOT learning a new method. Growing and maturing spiritual for the sake of opening a center with some of my new friends one day makes something else the point instead of God. I want to abandon myself. I don’t want to be the point anymore.

For some crazy reason God wants me to dwell deeply in Him and He in me just for the sake of being one together. Not to start a new ministry. Not to teach new classes. Not to apply something to my life. Actually Jesus wants to apply me to Him. Imagine that…

P.S. Just read this very awareness (not pursuing God merely for our benefit) in Jeanne Guyon’s classic entitled, Experiencing The Depths Of Jesus Christ. She writes, “I would like to remind you that I did not write this book for your enjoyment. Neither is it presenting just some method of prayer. The purpose of this book is to offer a way in which the Lord Jesus Christ can take full possession of you.” Amen.

Just So You Know…

Holly — Tue, 05 Apr 2011 20:36:53 +0000

Finished Rob Bell’s latest – Love Wins recently. Just so you know, I loved the book. The first chapter was worth the cost of the book alone. That guy is brilliant with questions! My favorite discussion, thinking, wondering, discovering things are questions! You can keep the “got all the answer” people – I love those who love questions!

It is a game changer. Those who have had a vending machine gospel (say or do just the right things and out pops your ticket to heaven), they will be challenged to say the least. I have been praying for the Spirit to profoundly be right there with them. Apparently that might add up to quite a few challenged people judging by the huge number of copies that have and keep flying off the shelves.

For our household (Jim read it right after I finished) it was confirmation. Much of our own recent journey and reading had already taken us to the wide open spaces of the God who is BIG enough to do whatever the Divine We intends to do! Our response was a hearty AMEN!

The books Rob suggests for further reading well worth reading! Richard Rohr’s books listed are stellar! Everything Belongs will always be my favorite I think. I am reading it again for the second or third time. So no, you won’t be able to borrow mine…just yet.

Include!!!

Holly — Sun, 13 Mar 2011 13:27:41 +0000

Those at the edge of any system and those excluded from any system, ironically and invariably hold the secret for the conversion and wholeness of that very group. They always hold the feared, rejected, and denied parts of the group’s soul. You see, therefore, why the church was meant to be that group that constantly went to the edges, to the “least of the brothers and sisters,” and even to the enemy. Jesus was not just a theological genius, but he was also a psychological and sociological genius. When any church defines itself by exclusion, it is always wrong. It is avoiding its only vocation, which is to be the Christ.

Only as the People of God receive the stranger, the sinner, and the immigrant, those who don’t play our game our way, do we discover not only the hidden, feared, and hated parts of our own souls, but the fullness of Jesus himself. We need them for our own conversion.

The Church is always converted when the outcasts are re-invited back into the temple. You see this in Jesus’ commonly sending marginalized people that he has healed, back into the village, back to their family, or back to the temple to “show themselves to the priests.” It is not just for their re-inclusion and acceptance, but actually for the group itself to be renewed.

Adapted from Radical Grace: Daily Meditations, p. 28, day 27

Embrace! Include! Listen to! Move towards! Yes, those of you who still participate in the institutional church make movements towards those who have criticisms! Those who love you enough to say hard things are dear friends and not enemies. It is not because what they have to say is always right – but what they have to say just maybe. Even if it is not, the person saying it is worth saving and keeping and wanting.

I said hard things to the leadership of an institutional church. I was shunned. The senior pastor stopped talking to me, with me. I was determined to be disloyal, dishonest in his estimation. He wanted my voice silenced! I was brutally excluded. If he had moved towards things, included me, discussed bravely we would have discovered things AND deepened our God-given relationship as brother and sister in Christ.

Look around you. Those on the fringes have much to offer if you are daring enough to embrace things outside your own comfort zone. It is not about who is right and who is wrong, it is about the relationship among ALL persons God has called to His body.

Thanks again, Richard Rohr for saying hard things of love to the Body of Christ!

Sermon of the Week!

Holly — Sat, 29 Jan 2011 21:21:02 +0000

With three sick children at home this week, there was a movie playing in the living room a couple of times a day. This is SO unlike our normal movie watching habits of one on Friday night and one on Saturday morning – period. But sick kids don’t embrace “on the couch days” like we adults do when we don’t feel good. So in order to keep them resting, I pop a movie in, they plop on the couch or in the recliner and they are happy and so is Dr. Mom.

My youngest boy picked The Three Musketeers. The closing scene is the inspiring and dramatic drawing of the swords. Each Musketeer raises his blade high in the sky, and connects with all the other raised blades forming like a shiny and sharp high five. With blades locked together, in one mighty voice they declare “All for one and one for all!” I just happened to be walking into the living room at just this moment. I stopped because I love that part! If I had had my sword on me, I would have joined them! And for the first time I was aware of what a great sermon that is!

What if was the way the body of Christ behaved? The whole group eager, willing, ready, at any moment to “lay down their life” for just one and each one eager, willing, ready, at any moment to “lay down their life” for the whole? Even better – what if the all was for the ONE (yes read the Almighty) and they understood that the ONE was for the all? In comparison, my observation is that the institutional church is good about the later, but lousy at the first. They are good about being for God; they are not so good about being for one another. But didn’t Jesus say it was the same thing? Something about how you treat one another is how you treat the Holy Trinity.

What if staff members walked into meetings after they had messed up and instead of receiving anger, accusations, and their walking papers they got a loud declaration that the all is FOR you (not against) and will all work for the restoration of the one? Hmmm…maybe institutional church leadership should watch The Three Musketeers!

Now least there be the accusation that I just violated that (by speaking out – sounds like being against) that was one of the healthiest expression of how they were “for” one another – timely correction and needed “heads ups”. When the youngest Musketeer was messing up, the others let him know. Many times it literally saved his life. He didn’t always like it at the time, but it never took long for the benefit of the correction to become quite evident! He learned that they would do whatever it took to see that he achieved his best and highest – not for his glory, but for the glory of the All.

All for one, and one for all. I LOVE THAT!

This Is What I’m Talkin About!

Holly — Wed, 19 Jan 2011 16:32:03 +0000

Coming to Our Senses

“But Esau ran to meet Jacob and embraced him; he threw his arms around
his neck and kissed him. And they wept.” Genesis 33:4
God does not intend for people to relate to one another at a distance or though other people. Genuine relationship involves personal communication. As Exodus 33:11 says, “The LORD would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks with his friend” (see also 2 John 12). If this is the idea for a true friendship, it is also the ideal for a relationship that has been broken by conflict and needs to be restored. Although other people can sometimes help get the restoration process started, its ultimate goal should usually be a personal, face-to-face meeting between those who have been estranged, so they can express and confirm repentance, confession, and forgiveness and experience together the grace and reconciliation of God.

Adapted from The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict
by Ken Sande, Updated Edition (Grand Rapids, Baker Books, 2003) p. 148.

Food for Thought

Do you relate more face-to-face or screen-to-screen? Why?

We live in a time of connectedness. We are connected via e-mail, the Internet, our cell phones, Blackberries, iPods, iPads, and iPhones. Being connected now ranks among the necessities of life, alongside food and shelter. But for all the beneficial ways (and there are many) that these technologies connect us, they connect us at a distance. And we find ourselves in a far country.

As Ken reminds us, the ideal for a friendship or relationship of any kind, is speaking face to face; God does not intend for people to relate primarily by way of distance. Notice the physical beauty inherent in Genesis 33.4. Jacob receives an embrace; have you ever felt the warmth of a hug from your iPod? Esau throws his arms around Jacob’s neck; it’s a little hard to feel the rough, hairy arms of your brother by way of a cell phone. Esau kisses Jacob; ask anyone in love if they would rather have the tactile sensations of a kiss or an e-mail full of emoticons. And then the two brothers weep; the Internet can raise the level of information in our heads, but can it cause our defenses to fall, so that tears spill from our hearts?

It’s easy to blame these tools, as if they are the problem. No, the problem is where it has always been–with us. We prefer distance to closeness, and darkness over the light. These tools just help us do it in style. We stride through life, gadgets in our pockets, patting ourselves on the backs, believing we’re really connected.

Maybe we all need one of those prodigal moments–”when he came to his senses” (Luke 15.17). True sense, as God intended, will return to us via our senses. It means being hungry enough to feel the pains in your stomach, or maybe your heart. It means feeling the burn in your legs as you run toward home or maybe the hurt from that broken relationship. It means feeling the embrace of the one you’ve been estranged from; an embrace that just might squeeze the tears out of you. That kind of closeness brings life out of death; it allows you to be found instead of lost. And that story always ends with fattened calves, rings on fingers, and parties hosted by the Father; none of which can be enjoyed from a distance.

May the leadership of the institutional church come to their senses! Go directly to one another! Anytime! Everytime! As many times as it takes!

The Code of Silence Is Death

Holly — Sun, 16 Jan 2011 16:50:22 +0000

Silence killed me off last October. Instead of someone, anyone, coming to me and saying words to let me know they were having hurts, or suspicions, or confusion they kept silent. Little things grow into big things in silence. Little splinters become daggers in silence. So months later when the silence was broken (apart from my knowledge – they did not say it to me), it came out as daggers that cut me up and killed me off.

It has just happened again. People were having small confusions, little suspicions, hurts but they kept silent. They did not go to the person directly. And then Friday afternoon they drew their daggers and cut off another staff person. No steps of Matthew 18 were followed once again. NO firing should ever come as a surprise! If it does it is evidence that silence was the code; not love, not grace, not compassion.

Why did it not unfold like this: As soon as any small red flag was felt, a conversation happened immediately with the two parties involved? More times than not things would be resolved. But what if something is wrong? What if you go to the person in the wrong with the full intent to help and heal and restore? What if the wrong is identified, talked about, apologized for, forgiven, plans for restitution are made and followed?

Love says stuff. Love is NOT silent.

THE INFORMATION WAS GREAT, AND MY SOUL’S FIRST REACTION WAS EVEN BETTER – EVIDENCE OF GOD AT WORK!

Holly — Mon, 08 Nov 2010 20:24:28 +0000

I read last night from Richard Rohr’s book Simplicity. I had read this section before but was touched by it in a way I had not yet experienced it. The following sentences are in the context of a person who is part (a priest no less) of an institutional church system and he is calling the dark side of that system for what it is – hurtful, destructive, and they very thing Jesus spoke against when teaching about how The Kingdom functions. Largely institutional church systems are a patriarchical (meaning only men) pyramid power structures.

“Pyramids are always pyramids of sacrifice. Whether it is the hundreds of thousands of slaves creating monuments to Egyptian kings, the sacrificial victims offering their hearts to Aztec gods, or the underpaid maids and janitors in the tourist hotels of the world, someone always has to give his life or her life so that someone else can be “special.” When that specialness is idealized and protected instead of avoided and made unnecessary, as Jesus taught, we see the destructive and dark side of power. Jesus built circles not pyramids. Those that the pyramids make powerful are hopelessly inflated. The powerless are endlessly deflated.”

The institutional church I served was a pyramid. We called it a “flow chart” but in all reality and functionality it was a power chart. I know – I made it. There was one person up at the top with a cascade of persons – mostly male – underneath. The primary thing that flowed was permission: the top giving permission to those underneath and those underneath giving their lives to idealize the specialness (singing and teaching) of the one at the top of the chart. I myself said more than once that my best service was “to make the senior pastor look good.” What a terrible disservice that was to him, and what a destructive disservice it was to all those who also followed suit and did whatever it took to make him look good.

My soul’s reaction to that was of deeper knowing of my guilt. I did it. I was on the chart. I said less, was less in order for the “higher and more special” might look good. But I also used the pyramid to display and promote my own mythical “specialness.” My guilt is the same. I was glad for that reaction. I am glad for the conviction the Holy Spirit brought. May it continue to grow to its fullest. It is time to be done nursing my wounds with the “sins of others.”

IT IS NONE OF MY BUSINESS!

Holly — Sun, 10 Oct 2010 14:41:54 +0000

At the end of one of the gospels Jesus responds to a question with basically saying that it was “none of your business.” I love that honesty! Jesus telling another person that some things are just none of your business. I’ve been using that as a guiding scripture lately. I’m amazed how many times a day I have to return to its wisdom.

Too many times, on too many days my mind turns over the people and events that were a part of our institutional church crash and burn. It has been a year now and really I am so ready to be done with it. I am ready to give place and energies to life-giving thoughts and wonderings. I have stopped checking the church website that I personally invested much into. My sort of online spying was counterproductive. So the desire to be done with it is there, but my mind does not always cooperate with my wishes.

Until I was reminded that in very practical terms, as well as in cooperation with movement towards forgiveness and healing, all of that stuff really is none of my business. What they do and don’t do is none of my business. (Although the selling of bricks was a bit hard to ignore – Yuck!) But quoting scripture (loose translation) “it is none of your business,” has been very effective.

So what is my business these days? Mostly enjoying is my business. I am so enjoying the expanding experience of the Presence of God. I am enjoying the deep connections with the Body of Christ in new and unexpected places and times. I am really enjoying the well of peace and joy that is springing up from within. I am enjoying my marriage and my children. I am enjoying running with my daughters. I am enjoying cooking good food – actually the eating part is more my favorite – on a regular basis. I am enjoying a beer as I sit on the front porch as dinner cooks.

So now on this warm, sunny, color-splashed October day, I best get down to business – there is some serious enjoying to be done before I enjoy a hot shower and slip into a cozy bed tonight.

IF IT SMELLS LIKE ONE, THEN…

Holly — Tue, 05 Oct 2010 13:56:56 +0000

Jasper Junction is a resale facility existing to raise funds for the local CDC. I discovered it out of need to find ways to make just one income provide for a household of 5 people. If I would ever again “go to church,” it just might be there. Mind you, this is not a church, but…if it acts like one, feels like one, smells like one, I think Jesus would say it is one!

People come to GIVE. People with an abundance (in this case it is possessions no longer wanted/needed, but still have value) show up all the time to happily give the abundance away. So people with MUCH, come to give. They are happy to have something helpful to do with their extra resources. They feel good that their donated items will translate into real help.

People can work there that would not be wanted or welcomed in most other work settings. Included are those needing to serve community service sentences. Included are those that have mental and/or physical handicaps. Included are those who have been determined by society as being, for lack of a better phrase, white trash. EVERYONE IS INCLUDED happily and they are treated with genuine dignity and respect.

Needy people are why they exist and who they exist for – THEY LOVE NEEDY PEOPLE! I’ve never seen needy people deeply treasured. Nobody wants to try and “fix” them. Nobody makes them feel bad about being needy. Nobody thinks less of them because they are in need. Need is embraced as a vital connection point and a mutual condition. Need is not bad here. NEED IS NOT BAD HERE.

Shopping there is such a vibrant friendly experience! The customers chat together, the work staff yaks to everyone and one another, we are beginning to exchange names! I walked in the other day and one of the ladies was excited to tell me that the craft shelves were newly loaded – she knows that is one area I watch for scrap wood for the boys to use when they build in the garage. Turns out another woman working there actually worked at the same retail store I did back when I just got out of high school. I didn’t remember her, but she thought she recognized me, we started chatting and…

Unwanted things are treasured here. Unwanted clothes, unwanted shoes, unwanted roller blades are transformed into easily attainable (because they are extra cheap on half price days!) to those lacking in money to buy new clothes, shoes, and even roller blades. Jesus’ best friends were members of the unwanted in the society of his day – tax collectors, fishermen, women. UNWANTED THINGS ARE TREASURED.

I never personally experienced an institutional church that acts, smells, feels like Jasper Junction. Yes, there were occasional “outreach” efforts, but they were temporary – not the heartbeat of their existence. I think I’ll go out there today and get a big whiff of church life. Jesus would work there!